Hot Doc: A Secret Baby Romance (Loving You Again) Read online

  My lips quirked in a smile. “Really?”

  “Of course. I was covered head to toe in amniotic fluid and had no idea what to do. And when the doctor handed the baby over to me, that sucker was slippery as hell. Nearly dropped it on the head too.”

  I laughed.

  She smiled. “What I’m trying to say is, we all start somewhere. This job is a learning curve, and as long as you keep trying your best to do better, I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it.”

  The door opened, and another nurse walked in—a cute blonde who flashed us a grin.

  “Tough day?” she asked.

  “Like you wouldn’t believe,” I responded, to which she winked.

  “It’s ok. We all have those. Within a week, you’ll get the hang of it.”

  “That’s what I’m telling her, Xena.” Carol turned back to me. “That being said, I think you should go home for the day after this. No…” She held up her hand to stop the protest that had already formed. “I’m not giving you the boot. But I don’t think it’s good for you to stay right now. Go home, calm down and come back tomorrow better. Ok?”

  The idea was tempting. I could cancel the babysitter and pick up Ela from her first day of school. Going home also meant escaping Cage for the day, kicking the can of our inevitable confrontation down the road for another day. But how long could I really avoid him?

  But in the end, I didn’t really have a choice, so I just nodded.

  “Mommy!”

  I couldn’t help but smile as my daughter jogged down the stairs to greet me at the front desk.

  I squatted right before she threw herself in my arms, wrapping her hands around my neck like a vice. “I missed you, mommy!”

  “I missed you too, baby!” I could feel her heartbeat against mine, and she smelt of sweat and like a child. My child. It made the stress of the day trickle right out of me. “Did you have fun today?”

  She wrinkled her face. “Not really. I wanted to be home with you.”

  She was so cute. I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Well, on the weekends, you can be with mommy all day. But you have to go to school on the weekdays.”

  “Why?”

  “I told you, sweetie. Because that’s how you make friends.”

  “But nobody wants to be my friend,” she stated. “They all have daddies, and I don’t.”

  The words struck a familiar chord of guilt in me. I’d never brought up Ela’s father to her, preferring to maybe address the situation when she was a little older. Lately though, Ela had become obsessed with the idea of having a dad after watching a cartoon with a dad and daughter duo who went on crime-fighting sprees together. Since then, she’d been pestering me about her who and where her dad was. I’d told her he was far away fighting bad guys and couldn’t see her because of that. It probably wasn’t the best way to handle the situation, but I honestly couldn’t bear to tell her the truth.

  Just one more thing I’d have to deal with later.

  But that hadn’t been the end of it. At least once a week, she brought it up, and every time she did, I would rethink my decision. The one I’d made all those nights ago when I’d taken her from him.

  No. You did the right thing. The thought is a firm one. I couldn’t have stayed, could not have let my Ela grow up the way I did. I had to give her stability, keep her safe, the way no one did for me.

  I waved goodbye to the front desk lady, and Ela and I began to make our way back home.

  “First days are sometimes like that, sweetie,” I said, comforting her as we walked. “Mommy had an awful first day too. But they get better. You just keep going in and doing your best, and I’m sure you’ll make friends in no time.”

  “Ok, mommy. If you say so.”

  I kissed her on the cheek, suppressing a smile at the sass in her tone. “Alright, so what did we learn at preschool today?”

  As Ela began to chatter on about her a b c’s, my thoughts drifted back to Cage.

  Seeing him earlier that day was an unprecedented shock to my system. Cage Burke was unlike any man I’d ever met, and his effect on me hadn’t been dulled by time. Unlike his brother, Cage was a man who took every single aspect of his life seriously and didn’t allow inefficiencies to remain for long. He was a man who made split-second decisions based on brief contact and cut off what he considered “nuisances” with merciless precision. I mean, it made sense. Every day he dealt with life and death and could not afford to be double-minded on anything. But it was that attribute of his that scared me to death.

  It made me horny as hell at the same time.

  Stop it, I told myself. But the image still came up uninvited. I could imagine Cage shirtless and gazing intensely at me as he orders me to touch myself, to drive myself higher to the peak of my arousal. That had been the fantasy that had gotten me through my 3-year-long abstinence. Whenever I masturbated, it was that image that flashed in my mind right before I went over the edge.

  The irony wasn’t lost on me, that the person I was still obsessed with after leaving the Burke family behind wasn’t the man I thought I was in love with, would marry and start a family with.

  No. It was his brother that set my entire body aflame.

  Jeez. The heat began to slowly unfurl in my stomach. Only one day of seeing Cage, and I was already back to my old habits. Apparently, I would have to crack out the vibrator once I put Ela down for her nap.

  But, after we got home, getting Ela to sleep proved to be harder than I originally anticipated.

  “I don’t wanna go to bed,” she yelled, signaling that she was in one of her cantankerous moods.

  Ela hated two things in this world—naps and veggies—and she would do just about anything to get out of taking either.

  I could already feel the argument coming. “Come on, baby. You know you have to take at least one nap every day to grow strong and healthy.” We had been at it for about two hours already, and the sun had long started its descent from the sky.

  “You don’t take naps, mommy, and you’re strong and healthy.”

  I couldn’t argue with that logic. “Yes, but I’m an adult. When you’re an adult, you don’t need naps as much.”

  “When am I gonna be an adult mommy?”

  “Not for a long time, sweetie.” In fact, if I’d had my way, she would never grow up. She’d never have to be faced with just how cruel and soul-crushing adult life could be. I wish she could stay a kid forever.

  “Tell you what.” I leaned in to look into her pretty blue eyes. “How about I give you a teeny tiny spoon of peanut butter, and you agree to go down for your nap. Would you like that?”

  Ela loved peanut butter, would probably sell her soul for a pint. But as she considered my proposal, the mulish expression on her face didn’t change. “Two spoons.”

  I rolled my eyes. My daughter was nothing if not a master negotiator. I really couldn’t tell where she got her bullheaded tenacity from because it certainly wasn’t from me.

  I knew it was time to switch on “stern mother” mode. I parted my lips to tell her that I was the mother and she was the child and therefore my word was law, but there was a sudden rap at the door.

  Ela and I both look towards it. “Are you expecting anyone?” I joked.

  She shrugged at me.

  The knock came again, louder. With a resigned sound, I walked towards it. “I’m coming. I’m coming. Jesus, hold your horses, will y—?”

  I didn’t get to finish the sentence because I swung open the door to find Cage at my doorstep, looking more pissed off than I’d ever seen him before.

  3

  Cage

  It had been a shitty start to an even shittier day.

  I woke up with a dull migraine. That, in itself, wasn’t unusual; I got them at least twice a week. As a doctor, I knew it was most likely a combination of stress from work and only four combined hours of daily sleep. If I had a patient like me, I would have prescribed uninterrupted bed rest for at least a day, lots of fluids, and a
change in schedule to reduce time spent working.

  Unfortunately, I wasn’t a patient. I was a surgeon and a damn good one. That meant my schedule was always filled to the fucking brim. And whatever free time I did have was spent trying to prevent the collapse of the dynasty my great grandfather built.

  I wasn’t the acting CEO of the oil business because I didn’t feel like I had enough experience to do the role justice. Plus, I genuinely had no interest in the oil or drilling for it. So, it had been a no-brainer decision to leave the day-to-day managing of the company to my father’s trusted partner—Grant Danvers. Danvers was excellent, efficient, and did a good job of running the place. His only problem was that he wasn’t a Burke.

  Due to the ownership conditions of Burke International, the Burke family held the controlling interest, and a Burke family member had to be on the board of directors. My father had wanted it that way because he never trusted leaving the family business in an outsider’s hands. As much as I didn’t necessarily agree with it, I had to respect his decision. So, even though Danvers was the CEO, I ultimately had the final say in the big decision-making processes. It was a huge responsibility, and I was determined not to screw up. It was why I stayed up most nights reading strategy proposals and analyzing all the arguments against them so that I could give my vote one way or another. And believe me, I studied everything down to the letter. I would never let myself make a mistake that could cause the downfall of the family business.

  Not like my father had done.

  And while I didn’t really enjoy anything about running the family business, there was no one else left to deal with it. Ever since my father died years ago and my brother, Ben, had gone off to rehab in rural Pennsylvania, I was the sole family member. Every single major decision had to be brought to my desk to pass. When you combined that with the fact that I was also the chairman of St. John’s Children’s Hospital and, while I didn’t perform as many operations as I used to, I still remained frequently on call for complex medical surgeries….I guess you could see that it was all physically slowly eating away at me. Hence, the headaches.

  Ignoring the pain in my skull, I swiftly got ready for work, my mind already on the tasks for the day.

  It was a surgery day, so I had two surgeries—a kidney transplant and a complicated hernia.

  As I listed them out, the patients’ faces appeared in my mind. I could remember every detail about them, down to what they had worn the first time I met them. I made myself do this, wouldn’t allow myself to operate unless I knew them inside-out.

  This is someone’s child. Someone's entire world could rest on the life of this child.

  So I couldn’t make mistakes. Ever. And I didn’t.

  After getting dressed, I skipped breakfast and called my PA, Rob, who answered on the second ring.

  “Hello.” His voice sounded tired, which I understood. He was only twenty-six years old, and I wasn’t going to deny that I worked him hard. Hell, he probably had it harder than every other PA in New York City. But I also paid him thrice his market price, including benefits that would make some CEOs drool. I didn’t mind. I would pay anything for the best, and Rob, despite his youth, was the best.

  “Good, you’re awake. I need you to look into that Umbridge contract for me again. Find a loophole.”

  “Good morning to you, boss. I slept very well, thanks for asking. How about you?”

  “Rob…” I wasn’t in the mood for his sarcasm that morning.

  “Sorry, sorry. It’s just been a long night, boss. You know, doing the kajillion things you asked me to do. Anyway, I’ve read the contract cover to cover, and I can’t find anything in there to let us out of it.”

  That’s what I was afraid of. It was the second issue with the family business. In his last few years as CEO, my dad made some truly horrible business deals, buying acres of land in Texas for Burke international on the promise of oil that had not yielded much. Turns out that the contractor had been nothing but a talented salesman who only peddled lies and dreams. I almost couldn’t believe it when I found out. It seemed unthinkable that my usually astute father would fall for such a blatant con. But that’s where we were.

  Danvers wanted me to just give it up, but it was 100 million dollars worth of loss, and everything in me rebelled at the idea of laying down like a bitch and just taking in.

  “Never mind. Just send it back to my desk, so I can look it over.”

  “I would say you’re not going to find anything that I couldn’t because I’m the one with the law degree, but then again, you’re you, so knock yourself out.”

  “And get started drafting the Fineman proposal. I want that on my desk by the close of today.”

  “ Aye aye, captain.” I could hear the frustration in his voice. He was probably cursing at me six ways to Sunday in his head, but I didn’t care as long as I got results. Yes, I was a bastard and a slave driver. But he already knew that before he started working for me.

  I hung up the phone and got in my Ferrari, enjoying the smooth purr as it started up. I wasn’t really the type for many luxuries, but I’ve loved cars and motorcycles since I was a kid. Something about the sound and feel of the 400 horsepower relaxed me.

  Although, the headache didn’t seem to want to go away any time soon.

  I should have probably taken something for it. But, I didn’t take pain killers even in the mildest form, especially after seeing what they had done to my mother. Maybe that was a little extreme, but 2/4 of my immediate family were addicts. That didn’t leave good odds for me.

  Speaking of addicts, the last time I talked to Ben a few days earlier, he’d sounded better. Although, he had started to reminisce about the past again, about everything he could have done differently. I tried not to be too hopeful about it; he did that every time he started getting clean, but his relapse was inevitable. So I did what I always did—told him I was proud of him, and he needed to let the past go. The past was in the past. You can’t change that, and if you don’t let it, that shit can haunt you.

  But apparently, I was a little off with that. Because not even a day after telling Ben that, Maddie fucking Flynn stood in front of me at my hospital, green eyes wide with shock.

  The first time I’d met Maddie, I’d thought she had the most arresting face. Heart-shaped with a smattering of freckles, a cloud of red curls, and wide green eyes uptilted at the corner when she smiled. Like a mischievous cat. And yes, I was attracted to her, as much as it disgusted me to admit. Even though Maddie was everything I had hated in a woman.

  Sloppy. Weak. Alcoholic.

  Exactly like my mother.

  Patricia Burke had once been a doting mother, but the loss of my sister to cancer had turned her into a vitriolic monster, who only seemed to derive pleasure out of pills, alcohol, and verbally abusing her children.

  Maddie Flynn was of the same ilk as my mother. I’d known it from the first day we’d met. And I knew she would destroy my brother, exactly the way my mother had. And, as with most things in my life, I was right.

  And she wanted me to believe she was a nurse. In my hospital?

  Not fucking likely.

  I already knew that I would be firing her by the end of the day, but I figured I would give her a fair chance to prove herself. If she proved to be as incompetent as I knew she would be, then it would be easy. If she didn’t, well…I would have to find another reason to fire her.

  People like her poisoned everything they touched. She’d already ruined my brother. I couldn’t have her poisoning everything I’ve built as well.

  But just as I expected, it was the former. Unbeknownst to her, I watched her every move as she set up, noting how jumpy she was, her lack of confidence. That was unacceptable for a nurse. I couldn’t have her potentially fucking up and harming the children. Turning over the equipment cart was just the last straw.

  “Get out!” I’d barked for the second time, and she zipped out of there. I nearly winced when she did, but I refused to feel guilty for
scaring her. She wasn’t the one who would suffer for her actions; Tate was. Tate Collins, the boy currently anesthetized on the operating table, was a foster kid with a severe case of lupus. He’d waited in line for months for a new kidney, and I’d fought hard for him to get it. But due to the severity of his disease, it was a complex surgery and had to be executed with precision. The fact that Maddie had almost fucked all that up pissed me off beyond belief.

  “Gee Burke give her a break,” Dr. Randy, my first assist, said. The huge man nodded to me, beard winking out of his surgical mask. “It’s her first day.”

  I glared at him. “We now have to delay the surgery by another thirty minutes until we can get the new equipment cleared. If she had done this during the surgery, Tate would have died. She’s lucky that’s all I did to her.”

  “I don’t think we should keep her,” Tessa chimed in. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, she’s a nice girl. But she’s a bit of a ditz. I must have explained set up to her about a billion times.”

  I glanced at Tessa, and she gave me an innocent smile in return.

  “Go get the new equipment,” I ordered. “Now.”

  Tessa hurried to do it, and I looked around the room. The anesthesiologist gave me a nod in agreement, but the tech looked apprehensive. Maybe my outburst had scared the kid. Good. Better he knew now rather than later that I didn’t accept fuck ups of any kind.

  Luckily, the rest of the surgery went well, and I moved on to the next. As time passed, the dull throb in my head elevated to a full-blown pounding on my skull. I knew I was nearly at my limit. But I still had one more thing to do before I could go home for the day.

  I walked briskly to the nurse’s station, signaling Carol, who rolled her seat over to me. “What can I do for you, Doctor?”

  “The new nurse. Where is she?” I hadn’t seen her around and wouldn’t be surprised if she was slacking off already.